I’m sure you’ll agree with me that nobody likes to fail.
But did you know that on average, women do have a much greater fear of failure than men?
I was just reading an interesting article that stated that a third of the female population would start a business if it wasn’t for the fear of failure. (London Business School). After some quick research I found that many studies back this up.
Wow! That’s a huge number. It stops women, not only from starting a business, but also in applying for that dream job, starting a non-profit they are passionate about, writing that book, or asking for the raise they rightfully deserve.
I can relate. I can think of many occasions in my life when I have undercharged for my work, not stepped up to an opportunity if I wasn’t 100% sure I would nail it, or criticized myself for getting anything less than an A in a test.
And it’s not all in our heads…. But then again….it turns out, it’s partly to do with the way we are wired. Women are generally more influenced by negative feedback than men. Hence we tend to take failure more personally.
And that can lead to a downward spiral in our self-worth and confidence.
So what to do?
Some psychologists and self-growth experts say it’s all about mindset. Others say building confidence has everything to do with taking action and developing competencies.
I think it’s a combination of both.
We can focus on changing our mindset all day long, but if we don’t take action towards the goals we want to achieve, confidence will still elude us. Deep down we will know that we are still avoiding the potential of failure.
I’ve had this experience when I’ve taken a block of time to really examine and refocus negative thought patterns. And helpful as that is, if I don’t then DO something to take me closer to my goals, by the end of the day anxiety has kicked in.
On the other hand, we can take action, but then beat ourselves up if it’s not “perfect” or we don’t immediately get the result we desired.
Sometimes I’ll write an article for my blog, record and post a video, or create what I think is a super cool and thought-provoking post for social media. And…. crickets… No response from my clan at all.
Despite taking action my mind attempts to convince me that I am a failure, I’ve nothing to say that folks want to hear, so why bother at all….
In reality, growing confidence in order to put yourself and your work out in the world in a powerful way requires BOTH taking the right actions AND having the tools to deal with your (and sometimes others) negative thoughts and criticism.
I know you have important and impactful work to do in the world. I do too. And part of my work is in supporting women entrepreneurs and aspiring entrepreneurs traverse the inner landscape from where they currently stand, to the place where their business momentum kicks in and really takes flight. Do let me know if I can be of support to you…
The world needs you and your message NOW!
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